catastrophic complication

I don't know anyone who contradicts themselves more than i do.

I always run into stick awkward situations that i never know how to get myself out of.



Sometimes i believe the only thing that has kept me sane is music and i think that alot of people couldn't agree with me more about that.

definition pertaining to my blog title

Catastrophic:any misfortune, mishap, or failure;

Complication:a complex combination of elements or things.


A mishap and complex combination of misfortune elements.


Some people say things happen for a reason and i believe that to a certain extent.

75% of the shitty things that i've had happened to me have been my decision fully and i don't see how there would be a "reason" other than i've obviously fucked up in my life and have been learning from it.

actually i don't even know where i'm going with that because in the end it will just be a battle of contradicting myself.



As of right now my mind set has been pretty bad (you know this is you follow me on twitter)
I don't know if it's just pms or everything is just overwhelming me to the point where my mind is literally spinning out of control.

for the past two weeks i've been fairly reclusive, hardly talking to anyone, not going anywhere except work and home isolating myself because i feel like i can't handle anyone or more so, to be honest, they will not be able to handle me. I'd compare my emotions to a roller coast but that'd be an understatement, i'd say more like those rides that shoot straight up then fall back down and just bounce up down and ect, i think you get the point.

there is no medium, i'm either happy, pissed off or sad. there is no in between.



Moral of this blog is I probably need to start medicating myself because I'm fucking insane.